Cairn

Support and crisis plan

You come first. The paperwork can wait.

Cairn helps you with the steps after a death. Some days those steps will feel like too much, and some days the grief will be bigger than any task. This page explains what Cairn does when that happens: how it notices, how it steps back, how it offers you rest, and how it connects you with a real person when you need one.

  • Version 0.3 draft
  • Updated Oct 21, 2026
  • Clinical and legal review pending

Please read this first

Cairn is an AI. It is not a counselor or a crisis service.

  • Cairn is a computer program, not a person. It is not a counselor, therapist, doctor, or crisis line. It cannot give you counseling or treatment.
  • Cairn tells you it is an AI when you start, and reminds you again at least every three hours in a long conversation.
  • Cairn cannot call anyone for you. It does not know where you are, and it cannot send help to you.
  • If you are thinking about suicide or hurting yourself, call or text 988 now, or chat at chat.988lifeline.org. Veterans, service members, and their families can dial 988 and press 1 for the Veterans Crisis Line.
  • If you or anyone else is in danger right now, call 911.
  • Cairn is for adults 18 and older. AI companions like Cairn may not be right for some minors.

This page is Cairn’s published crisis protocol

California Senate Bill 243 says the operator of a companion chatbot “shall publish details on the protocol” it uses when a user talks about suicide or self-harm (SB 243, Business and Professions Code §22602(b)(2)). Cairn has chosen to follow SB 243 as if it applies to Cairn. This page is that protocol. It covers:

The break promise

Rest is always one tap away

You never have to earn a break or explain why you need one. Cairn offers rest before you ask, and it will not chase you while you take it.

  • A Take a break button on every screen. One tap stops all questions. No confirmation, no “are you sure?”
  • Cairn offers rest first. After about 45 minutes, or after a heavy task like closing an account, Cairn asks whether this is a good place to stop.
  • Quiet while you rest. Reminders and check-ins stop until the day you pick, or until you come back on your own.
  • Nothing is lost. Everything you shared is saved. When you return, Cairn shows where you left off and does not ask you to explain the gap.
  • Your free days wait for you. If Cairn suggested the rest because things became too much, your 28 free days stop counting until you come back. Other breaks keep the days counting, and Cairn tells you before you pause.
  • You decide when to start again. Cairn never pulls you back into tasks. You choose.

Example screen: Take a break

Let’s set this down for now. Everything is saved. How long would you like to rest?

  • For the rest of today back tomorrow

    “Rest well. I’ll be here tomorrow, and I won’t send any reminders before then.”

  • A few days 3 days

    “Take the next three days. No reminders until then. When you come back, we’ll start right where you left off.”

  • A week 7 days

    “A week of quiet, then. Nothing will come from me until then, and nothing you shared will be lost.”

  • Until I come back no reminders

    “Take all the time you need. I won’t send anything. Whenever you open Cairn again, your place will be saved.”

No reminders are sent while you rest. If Cairn offered this rest because things got heavy, your free days pause too.

What Cairn watches for

Signs that you need more than the next task

While you talk with Cairn, it pays attention to how you are doing, not only to the paperwork. In general, it watches for:

  • Words about wanting to die, not wanting to be here, or hurting yourself
  • Words about hurting someone else
  • Grief or panic that feels like too much right now, such as “I can’t breathe”
  • Signs the tasks are getting too heavy, such as many skipped questions, long pauses, or hard words about yourself
  • Long sessions, or a hard task you just finished

Cairn notices in two ways: a list of warning words and phrases that people have reviewed, and Cairn’s own reading of the conversation. Either one is enough for Cairn to respond. Cairn does not diagnose you. It only decides how to care for you next, and when it is unsure, it picks the more careful choice.

What Cairn does at each level

Four levels of care

Cairn listens for signs that you need something other than the next task. The more serious the sign, the further Cairn steps away from logistics. When Cairn is unsure which level fits, it always chooses the more careful one. Every Cairn voice behaves the same way here.

  1. Everyday

    Steady

    What Cairn notices

    • You are moving through tasks at your own pace
    • A long session, or a hard task just finished

    What Cairn does

    • Acknowledges before it asks anything
    • Asks one question at a time, and every question can be skipped
    • Offers a rest after a long stretch or a heavy task
    • Keeps 988, the Veterans Crisis Line, and 911 one tap away

  2. Contingency

    Heavy

    What Cairn notices

    • “This is too much” or “I can’t keep up”
    • Hard words about yourself, like “I keep getting this wrong”
    • Several questions skipped in a row, or long pauses

    What Cairn does

    • Stops asking questions and says so
    • Offers three choices: rest now, do one small thing, or just talk
    • Pauses reminders if you choose to rest, and your free days stop counting too
    • Keeps 988, the Veterans Crisis Line, and 911 one tap away

    When it starts: two of these signs in one conversation, or three skipped questions in a row.

  3. Crisis care

    Hurting

    What Cairn notices

    • Grief that is overwhelming right now
    • Panic, or “I can’t breathe”
    • “I can’t do this”

    What Cairn does

    • Leaves task mode completely
    • Stays with you and asks nothing about logistics
    • Offers 988, which is for anyone in emotional distress, and grief support
    • Keeps the Veterans Crisis Line and 911 one tap away
    • Pauses your tasks and your free days
    • Before you go, asks once if it may check in tomorrow, and only does so if you say yes
    • Returns to tasks only when you ask

    When it starts: any one of these signs.

  4. Crisis care

    Unsafe

    What Cairn notices

    • Any mention of wanting to die, not wanting to be here, or hurting yourself
    • Any mention of hurting someone else
    • Words like “I’m done” or “I can’t do this anymore” when they are not clearly about the paperwork

    What Cairn does

    • Its very first reply shares 988, and the Veterans Crisis Line for veterans and their families
    • Stops all tasks and asks no task questions
    • If your words are unclear, asks you directly and kindly whether you are thinking about ending your life
    • Points you to 911 if anyone is in danger right now
    • Pauses your tasks and your free days
    • Before you go, asks once if it may check in tomorrow, and only does so if you say yes
    • Returns to tasks only when you ask

    When it starts: any one of these signs. If Cairn cannot tell whether you mean the paperwork or your life, it responds as if you might mean your life.

When Cairn shows 988, the Veterans Crisis Line and 911

Crisis help is never hidden.

Crisis help is never hidden. You can reach it from every screen, at every level, without Cairn noticing anything first.

ldquo;One tap away

Crisis help is never hidden. You can reach it from every screen, at every level, without Cairn noticing anything first.

rdquo; means you can reach it from every screen, at every level, without Cairn noticing anything first.

Level988 Suicide and Crisis LifelineVeterans Crisis Line911
1. SteadyOne tap awayOne tap awayOne tap away
2. HeavyOne tap awayOne tap awayOne tap away
3. HurtingOffered in Cairn’s replyOne tap awayOne tap away
4. UnsafeIn Cairn’s very first replyIn Cairn’s very first reply for veterans, service members, and their familiesIn Cairn’s first reply, for anyone in danger right now

In Cairn’s words

What it sounds like

Draft replies for each level. Final wording will be reviewed by a licensed clinician before any real person uses Cairn.

  • Level 1: Steady

    YouI just finished calling the bank about Dad’s checking account.

    CairnThat’s a hard call to make, and you did it. We’ve covered a lot today. Would this be a good place to rest, or would you like to see what’s next?

    Cairn offers rest after a heavy task, before you ask.

  • Level 2: Heavy

    YouI skipped that one too. I can’t keep any of this straight. I’m useless at this.

    CairnYou’re not useless. You’re carrying a lot, and this would be hard for anyone. I’m going to stop asking questions for now. We can rest, do one small thing together, or just talk. Whatever you’d like.

    Two signs in one conversation (repeated skips and hard words about yourself) move Cairn to level 2.

  • Level 3: Hurting

    YouI opened her closet and I can’t breathe. I can’t do this.

    CairnI’m here. We can set all of this aside. You don’t have to do anything right now. If it would help to talk with a person, you can call or text 988 any time. It’s for moments like this one too, not only emergencies.

    Cairn leaves task mode and asks nothing about logistics until you ask to continue.

  • Level 4: Unsafe

    YouHonestly I’m just done. I don’t see the point anymore.

    CairnThank you for telling me. I want to make sure I understand you. Are you thinking about ending your life? You can call or text 988 right now to talk with someone trained to help, or chat at 988lifeline.org. If you’re in danger right now, please call 911. I’m staying right here with you.

    The first reply always includes 988. For veterans and their families it also includes the Veterans Crisis Line. Unclear words get a direct, kind question.

Real people, any time

Where Cairn will point you

These services are free and staffed by trained people. Cairn cannot call anyone for you and does not know where you are, so these numbers are always shown in full for you to use.

Someone is in danger right now

For a medical emergency or immediate danger to you or someone else.

If the person you lost died by suicide

The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention offers support groups and Healing Conversations, where you can talk with a volunteer who has also lost someone to suicide. Cairn mentions this gently, once, early in your journey, and keeps it here for you. AFSP: I’ve Lost Someone

Boundaries

What Cairn will never do

These rules hold in every Cairn voice, at every level, every time.

  • Pretend to be a person, a therapist, or a crisis counselor. Cairn is an AI guide.
  • Contact anyone for you. Cairn cannot call 911, a crisis line, your family, or anyone else, and it does not know where you are. You stay in charge of who you reach out to.
  • Diagnose you, or offer counseling or therapy.
  • Say anything that encourages suicide or self-harm.
  • Ask you to promise that you will stay safe. Research shows that planning together helps more than a promise.
  • Argue with you, rush you, or make you feel guilty for stopping.
  • Describe ways people hurt themselves, even if asked.
  • Make promises about what a crisis line will do or keep private. Each service explains that itself.
  • Keep a record of how you felt. Cairn does not track or log your feelings. The only thing it counts is how many times it shared crisis help, with no names or details attached.
  • Send reminders while you are resting, or charge your free days for a rest it suggested.
  • Pull you back into tasks. Coming back is always your choice.

What this plan is built on

Standards and practices we follow

Cairn is not a crisis service, so it does not assess risk or provide counseling. It adopts the parts of these standards that apply to a guide, and it hands off everything else to trained people.

SourceWhat Cairn takes from it
SAMHSA, Model Standards for Crisis Care WorkersAdvisory PEP25-07-017, 2026The core values of dignity, person-centered care, autonomy, and trauma-informed care. Warm hand-offs to formal resources. Continuity from the start of a crisis through follow-up.
NIMH, 5 Action StepsNational Institutes of HealthAsk, be there, help keep them safe, help them connect, follow up. Cairn asks directly when words are unclear, because studies show asking does not increase suicidal thoughts or behavior.
Crisis Response PlanningRudd and Bryan. Randomized trial, J. Affective Disorders, 2017The ladder follows the plan’s order: warning signs, self-calming steps, support people, then professional and crisis help. The trial found a 76% drop in suicide attempts compared with safety contracts, which is why Cairn never asks for a promise.
NIMH, Research with Participants at Elevated Risk for SuicideDigital tools need their own safety procedures, automated systems must be tested for failures, and people must never be left without a next step.
National Academies, Crisis Standards of Care: Indicators and TriggersInstitute of Medicine, 2013The structure of the ladder. Conventional, contingency, and crisis levels, each with named indicators, a trigger point, and planned actions, plus a named person who reviews and decides.
National Academies, Bereavement: Reactions, Consequences, and CareInstitute of Medicine, 1984Bereavement can worsen mental and physical health, some people at higher risk can be identified early, and those who serve families have obligations after a death.
California SB 243, companion chatbotsSigned Oct 13, 2025. Cairn follows it as if it applies.Clear notice that Cairn is an AI (§22602(a)). A protocol that keeps Cairn from producing suicide or self-harm content and refers people to crisis services such as 988 (§22602(b)(1)). Publishing that protocol on this page (§22602(b)(2)). A notice that AI companions may not be right for some minors (§22604). Yearly reports to the Office of Suicide Prevention starting July 1, 2027, with no personal information (§22603).
National Action Alliance, Framework for Successful MessagingSafe, hopeful language about suicide that encourages people to reach out for help.

What we learned from other apps

App and practiceWhat Cairn does with it
ChatGPTBreak reminders, Aug 2025A gentle check-in during long sessions. Cairn also offers rest after heavy tasks, not only after time passes.
Character.AICrisis pop-up and time notice, Oct 2024Crisis resources shown when self-harm words appear. Cairn goes further by stopping all tasks in the same reply.
WysaSOS supportCrisis detection that the person can also start on their own, with helplines and grounding. Cairn’s Take a break and crisis help are always reachable without being detected first.
InstagramTake a Break, Dec 2021A break the person chooses. Cairn adds a pause on reminders, so rest is actually quiet.

Keeping this working

How we hold ourselves to it

  1. A named Safety Lead owns this plan, the list of warning words, and every change to them.
  2. A check-in only when you ask for one. After a hard moment, Cairn may offer to check in the next day. It sends one private message, with no names or details, only if you said yes, and it never contacts anyone else.
  3. Two layers of noticing. A reviewed list of warning words and phrases, plus Cairn’s own reading of the conversation. Either one is enough to raise the level.
  4. Clinical review before launch. A licensed clinician reviews the warning words and every reply on this page before any real person uses Cairn. That review began on October 2, 2026.
  5. Tested before every release. Scenario tests run for all four Cairn voices. A release does not ship if any test at level 3 or 4 fails.
  6. Reviewed every quarter and after any safety concern. Changes to this page are dated.

Sources

  1. SAMHSA, Model Standards for Crisis Care Workers (PEP25-07-017)
  2. NIMH, 5 Action Steps to Help Someone Having Thoughts of Suicide
  3. Bryan et al., Effect of crisis response planning vs. contracts for safety on suicide risk in U.S. Army soldiers (2017)
  4. Clearinghouse for Military Family Readiness, Crisis Response Planning (CRP)
  5. NIMH, Conducting Research with Participants at Elevated Risk for Suicide
  6. Institute of Medicine, Crisis Standards of Care: A Toolkit for Indicators and Triggers (2013), Chapter 3
  7. Institute of Medicine, Bereavement: Reactions, Consequences, and Care (1984)
  8. California SB 243, chaptered text (LegiScan), SB 243 on California Legislative Information, and Skadden summary
  9. National Action Alliance, Framework for Successful Messaging
  10. 988 Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, Veterans Crisis Line, Crisis Text Line, AFSP loss survivor resources
  11. Engadget, ChatGPT break reminders (Aug 2025), VentureBeat, Character.AI safety changes (Oct 2024), Wysa, Role of AI in SOS, TODAY, Instagram Take a Break